My Story
God Does Not Waste the Pressure
The Story Behind The Grape Smash
Every journey has a beginning.
Mine didn’t start with a plan to write a book or launch a ministry. To be honest, it began in a season I never would have chosen—a season marked by pressure I couldn’t outrun and a sense of loss that felt final.
There are moments when everything you thought was secure begins to give way. Whether it is triggered by failure, grief, or circumstances you never saw coming, the result is the same: life changes in ways you did not expect and cannot control. I discovered that when the crushing comes, the path forward is not quick or easy. You have to walk through it slowly, honestly, one difficult step at a time.
The Image of the Press
In the middle of that season, a specific image took hold of my heart. In the ancient world, grapes were gathered and placed into a stone winepress. It wasn’t a gentle process. They were piled together and crushed under immense weight.
I first encountered this picture years ago in a devotion by Oswald Chambers. He described how a grape must be smashed before its true value—the wine—can be released. That image stayed with me, but I didn’t fully understand it… until I became the grape.
The crushing wasn’t quick, and it certainly wasn’t easy. But over time, I began to see that it was purposeful.
God wasn’t absent in the pressure. He wasn’t rushing me to “get over it” or demanding quick spiritual answers.
Through it all, I began to recognize more clearly the presence of Jesus—not distant, not hurried, but near. Meeting me in the middle of the struggle. Patient. Faithful. Steady.
Not removing the pressure…
but walking with me through it.
And slowly, I began to understand something I had not seen before:
Brokenness is not the end of the story.
Because of King Jesus, it never is.
The One who was broken for us meets us in our brokenness—and begins to restore what we could never restore on our own.
It is often the place where He begins His deepest work.
From a Story to a Journey
The Grape Smash wasn’t written as a program. It was born out of a journey—a raw discovery that God does not waste our crushed seasons.
I began to realize that many people in our churches are walking through similar pressure, yet they often feel they lack a safe place to be honest about their struggle.
So this became more than a story.
It became a pathway.
A way for individuals and churches to stop pretending, to look at their brokenness through the lens of Scripture, and to take the next faithful step toward renewal—walking with Christ in the midst of it, not just trying to get past it.
If You Find Yourself Here
If you find yourself under pressure today, hear this:
You are not alone.
If your story includes failure, loss, or unanswered questions, you are not disqualified.
Jesus meets us in these places—
not after we’ve fixed them,
but in the midst of them.
God is still at work—even in the crushing.
Especially in the crushing.
One honest step at a time.